Enough! Enough with lame excuses, enough with daily struggles to ‘find’ much needed motivation and the lack of self respect. Shame. I don’t remember anymore, but I was surely getting close to a re-re-re-republishing my list of 26 things to do before 26 this morning. I really like lists, but this one … Not so much. It’s the third iteration of a post first published short after my 25th birthday. The second version was published around New Year’s – don’t even ask, and now this IS the final one.
Why the constant republishing you ask? First one was half real, half a humoristic attempt. It wasn’t as thought out as it should be, so it grew slowly on various post-it notes, texts, emails and evolve to an almost identical one you can find on the link above. It was one item, one promise I made to myself that made me re-re-republish the post through January and February at least a couple of times.
Run. Every. Single. Day.
As I said, it was a promise. Not a challenge, not just a list item which should be crossed out every single day for the next 200+ days, but a promise. I
used to love running! I stood on a podium in mountain running national championship. I ran my first half-marathon when I was 11!, my first marathon was at 17 and first ultra a year later. I knew I wasn’t fast enough to compete with younger runners on shorter distances, so I ran far and loved it. A combination of injuries, laziness and a new hobby made me forget that. I forgot how it feels to cross the line after 3 hours of pushing it, how it feels when your heart is closing in on that magic number of 200 beats per minute, when you’re chasing the runner in front of you and I miss it.
After years of going back and forth with a mind that wants to put on the running gear but gives up when all of it is somehow just too damn small, I think it’s finally time to cut the bulshit and just get out there. I published the list this morning and almost broke the promise I made the same day. Today, I spent 10+ hours in the office, went directly to another meeting, came home hungry and tired at 9 PM. Ate, turned on the latest episode of Big Bang Theory and two hours later I was laying in bed thinking about how I need to change that publish date on my list.
Enough! I kissed my girl, got up while listening how crazy I am and went for a run at 11:10 PM. 3,5k later I felt fat, slow, tired and happy af! Day 1, check. It was not about the distance or speed, but about breaking those chains of laziness & comfort. Next few weeks will be a nightmare, but I think I can handle it.